Movie Reviews

Satans Blade Movie

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"Satans Blade Movie"
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Satan's Blade (1984) Starring Tom Bongiorno, Stephanie Leigh Steel, Thomas Cue, Elisa R. Malinovitz, Janeen Lowe, Ramona Andrada, Diane Taylor, Marti Neal, Fred Armond, Meg Greene, Mary Seamen, Richard Taecker, Paul Batson, Ricky Harding.

Directed by L.Scott Castillo.

Runtime: 76 Minutes.

Rating: R (Violence, Gore, Nudity, Coarse Language)

"Let's go see who our monster is!"

Bankrobbers make off with $50,000 in a daring daylight robbery after which they hole up at a small cabin owned by a Rocky mountain inn. One double crosses the other yet both are killed as a mysterious knife-wielding psycho intercedes.

The place has a history of hosting the murder sprees of a local monster armed with the title weapon. Two young couples looking to hit the ski hills and the fishing hole are warned by the mother of the innkeeper that they stay at their own risk but they all agree that it is too late to change their plans and check in.

Five young party girls make the same decision but go a step further and elect to stay in the cabin where the murders took place the evening before. Sufficive to say that turns out to be a poor decision for everyone.

With the robotic line delivery and wooden acting of the actresses and sparse screen credits to their name the cast appears to have been a case of the production team taking what they could get. Until you have scrapped the bottom, the very bottom, you can't know what it really is and that very much applies to casting though it may hurt the feelings of certain actors.

Rounding up deliciously unrecognisable no name talent can be just what the doctor ordered when the subtext of recognisable faces can be a burden as it is at times in films like this. Yet few things can counter the indescribable detriment of bad screen acting done by people who have never been in a movie before.

The dialogue is not really that bad and there is some character development in the script that goes beyond what you might normally expect to see in a slasher film. But it is all torpedoed by the lifeless respective lacks of presence the actors have. A good actor can deaden bad dialogue. By the same token bad actors can make good dialogue sound awkward.

I don't imagine they bothered to export this title to foreign markets but I should think that if they had dubbed versions of the film would likely have improved how it would be received immeasurably.

The particularly unimpressive cast of actors trying in vain to act in this film could have the impact of their poor line delivery deadened by some foreign stage actor used to doing classical theatre but trying to make a few bucks (Lira, Francs, Marks et al) moonlighting with some voice over work, the kind of sideline that has helped keep Canadian actors fed and housed for five decades.

More about this author: Jason Daniel Baker

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